SILENCE! #177

February 22nd, 2016

 

 

WHEN YOU’VE BEGUN TO THINK LIKE A GUN, THE REST OF THE YEAR HAS ALREADY GONE

Welcome welcome welcome welcome….WELL COME ON THEN! Don’t just stand there on the doorstep snivelling! In or out, make your choice. But when you’re in you’re in, if you know what I mean. And if you don’t know what I mean, then you’re out. And if you’re out, you’re out for good, if you get my gist. And if you get my gist then you’re on my team – and if you’re on my team then you’re in. SO GET IN FOR GOODNESS SAKE. You’ve let out all the heat. And I’d only just got this podcast nice and toasty. GAH!

Welcome to SILENCE! The comics podcast for discerning imbeciles.

<ITEM> The Beast Must Die & Gary Lactus pack up their troubles in their old kit bags and  smile, smile, smile – all the way into some classic admin. And it’s a doozy. Sponsorship out the wazzoo, some honest to goodness SILENCE! News abbout DC: Resnooze and a whole heap more

<ITEM> BUT! There’s also a great episode of SILENCE! (Because the Film has Started) with The Beast Must Die on Austrian horror Goodnight Mommy and Gary Lactus on Deadpoo. I mean Deadpoo. Goddamnit, no, I mean Deadpoo. DEADPOO!

<ITEM> Das Reviewniverse with hot topical chattering on Sammy Harkham’s Crickets, Spider Woman, Stray Bullets, Power Man & Iron Fist, Bitch Planet, Swamp Thing, Katsuhiro Otomo’s Memories and Farewell To Arms, Huck and the Deadline 1990 Xmas Special

Whooooooooooosh! Hear that? That was your mind being blown.

click to download SILENCE!#177
 

[email protected]

@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie
@bobsymindless

You can support us using Patreon if you like.

This edition of SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the greatest comics shop on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton. It’s also sponsored the greatest comics shop on the planet GOSH! Comics of London.

SILENCE! #144

June 2nd, 2015

 

 
 

SHE LOOKS LIKE EVE MARIE SAINT, IN ON THE WATERFRONT

“So like with this second album we really wanted to just totally get away all the stuff that everyone associated with that first album y’know? Like, we really wanted to strip out a lot of the poppy stuff and just really let the tracks just like find themselves y’know? We’d been listening to a lot of Can, Neu! y’know Krautrock stuff but also like a lot of Italo-disco y’know? And that just totally informed the epic, spaced out grooves we kind of ended up with. And like we were really getting pressured to come up with a hit single, like something that the label could totally pitch to, I don’t know Radio 6 or something, but we were so totally against that, because like really we felt we’d really done that whole three minute thing y’know and Gavin was trying out this weird singing style, kind of trying for that Liz Frazer ethereal stuff y’know but with this real kind of screechy falsetto y’know, and he’d totally just given up with traditional vocals and moved into some kind of impressionistic moaning and shit y’know? Really pushing the boundaries. And Tiny Darren was just totally entranced with all that Bollywood soundtrack stuff so he was really into just bringing that vibe into the rhythm section and then Kath was really intent on everyone swapping instruments on the final track cos she’d been using Eno’s Oblique Strategies and wanted to get like a sort of Tortoise jamming thing going, but much more primitive and skronky y’know. Really bold, challenging stuff.  And we were really really pleased with the way the whole album hung together, even though the label were really nervous about the fact that we sacked Terry Nuggins and ended up producing the whole thing ourselves, which I actually think really kind of brave actually, considering that Terry had just produced the Brontosaurus album, but we like knew that we’d done the right thing, the honest thing, y’know. And when the reviews came in they were mixed and kind of sometimes terrible and a lot of our fans like tuned out, like a lot, and we got fully dropped, but I still totally stand by the record. Y’know?”

“Listen mate, can I just get my burger?”

<ITEM> It’s an extra big portion of SILENCE!, the only podcast to have started in the Elizabethan era. ZOUNDS! Peppy new recruit Bobsy joins those grizzled street veterans, who are gettin’ too ol’ for this shit, The Beast Must Die & Gary Lactus.

<ITEM> Admin, get yer fresh admin! Only £50 a portion! Sponsorshizzle, Blue Peter, the Harmontown documentary and Big Hero 6? They’re all here and ready to please

<ITEM> Reviewniverse? Why yes I will, and and I’ll go large as well! Material, Providence, Necronomicon (film), Insufferable, Millar Vs Morrison, Resident Alien, Convergence, Secret Wars, Shazam!, Optic Nerve, Swamp Thing, Kitchen, Wytches and oh so much more.

<ITEM> Y’know what that sound is? the smallest violin in the world playing just for you cos the podcast’s OVER! Boo Hoo!

Click to download SILENCE!#144

Contact us:

[email protected]

@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie
@bobsymindless

This edition of SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the greatest comics shop on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton. It’s also sponsored the greatest comics shop on the planet GOSH! Comicsof London.

SILENCE! #114

September 16th, 2014

 

I DON’T WANNA BE BURIED, IN A PET SEMATARY

<ITEM> Lazy Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 has gone astray – does anyone miss it? Be careful as it could be lurking in your inbox bumping uglies with a particularly virulent phishing scam. In the meantime Gary Lactus & The Beast Must Die bring you the yawning chasm of comics kritizism that is…SILENCE!

<ITEM> Sponsor-Shimmy-shimmy-YA!, there’s Jingles, Confusion of the Matts, Quick Strips, Myriad, Cartoon County and a whole sweaty fistful more…

<ITEM> What’s that light in them thar hills? Why that’s the Reviewniverse welcoming foolish prospectors into it’s gaping maw…lucky youse got theboys to light the way…they be talkin’ Space Horse Redux, Wild’s End, Annihilator, Dave McKean photocopying, LA apocalypse narrative, Ms Marvel, Swamp Thing, Justice League Unlimited, Future’s End, Prophet: Strikefile, Terminal Hero, Death of Wolverine, Dark Ages, MPH, Copperhead, Captain Victory, Caliban, Avengers, the general bizarre state of DC Comics and a whole dogpile more…

<ITEM> I CAN SEE THE OTHER SIDE! There’s just time Silence (Because My Mouth Is Full Of Delicious Food), Darren Cullen News, Roberty Bobbity’s Spacehorse Riders and not a jot more.

NOW GIT.

Click to download SILENCE!#114

Contact us:

[email protected]
@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie

This edition of SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the greatest comics shop on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton.
It’s also sponsored the greatest comics shop on the planet GOSH! Comics of London.

SILENCE!#79

October 8th, 2013

LISTEN TO THIS I’LL TELL YOU ABOUT THE HEARTACHE. I’LL TELL YOU ABOUT THE HEARTACHE AND THE LOSS OF GOD

<ITEM> A girl was sick on the bus on the way home!

<ITEM> It’s OK! I reached my stop before the stench got too overwhelming…

<ITEM> And it gave me something to start this post with, this post wot’s all about SILENCE!#79 innit

<ITEM> bobsy’s recent squat on Gary Lactus’ spaceship comes to an end this week so the boy’s go full blub and do some shoutouts to important chums and some other Mindless/Silence housekeeping before

<ITEM> Our tanned and rested bro (sorry for calling you bro) Beast Face Ghost Must Die Killah sends us a lovely message from beyond Bali and demands your listener love else he might not return – SILENCE! dies at dawn unless you touch him on the winky!

<ITEM> We spend a few mins flicking off bouncing Belgian Brecht Evens’ marvelous The Wrong Place (Graphic Novel! Not For Kids etc!) before shambling rudely into the Reviewniverse, where we have a good old look at

<ITEM> In no particular order: Batman Black & White #2, The Witching Hour one-shot, Hinterkind #1, Trillium #3, Solid State Tank Girl #4 (comic of the week btw), Marvel Knights Spyider-Man #1, Forever Evil #2, Swamp Thing #24, Batwing #24, Superior Foes of Spyider-Man #4, Iron Man #16, All New X-Men #17, Daredevil Dark Nights #s4 & 5, Infinity #2 and then a few of the week’s other floppies, but we rattle through them quite quickly.

<ITEM> Then Gary waves a lace hanky at bobsy as he wishes a fond farewell to – – yeah not really it’s fine you’ll enjoy it. Back next week with the big Beast!

<ITEM> Peace out cheers yo

click to download SILENCE!#79

click to download SILENCE!#79

Contact us:
[email protected]
@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie
@bobsymindless

This edition of SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the greatest comics shop on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton. This was bobsy’s last time in the spaceship for a while so we (well, he) (well, me) went full swears on this, blue air all over the fucking shop, sorry Steve, love you X

Oh, and GOSH!

SILENCE! #59

April 22nd, 2013

 

 

IS EVERYTHING ALRIGHT IN HERE? YES NANNY!!!

Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is more dangerous than ever before…because Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is tipsy, emotional and inappropriately tactile. ONLY JESTING fleshbags. Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 does not drink, has no emotions and cannot touch. Is straight edge hardcore. Yes sir.

Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 ‘likes’ this!

<ITEM> The Sponsorship Boys are here oi oi oi! Plus, yet more thank you jingles for the Friends of Silence

<ITEM> It’s the return of disgraced American newscasterisers Gary Lactenberg and Danny Beastman, and the results are somewhere west of spectacular. SILENCE! News is back and it wants your children.

<ITEM> When you get to the bottom you go back to the top of the Reviewniverse and you go for a riiiiiiiiide…Daredevil, Justice League, 2000AD, Milligan & McCarthy, Captain Marvel, Captain America, Swamp Thing, Nova, Superior Spiderman, Batwoman, Age of Ultron, Wolverine & The X-Men, Five Ghosts, Iron Man, Wonder Woman, 1963, Donald Simpson and Megaton Man.

Oh how we laughed! How we sang! How we splashed around the shallows as the baby sharks nibbled our toes and the blood turned the surf a frothy pink…How we listened to SILENCE!

click to download SILENCE!#59

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

SILENCE! #34

October 8th, 2012

 

WHERE THE HELL’S THE RZA??

SILENCE! no.34 is upon you. Gladness….oh what’s the point? Sometimes being an omnipresent disembodied narrator just isn’t enough y’know? I mean, I had dreams when I was younger – what happened to them? I wanted to be a dancer. I have thighs like a f*cking gazelle…and here I am making up a bunch of lies, to tell some degenerates in arrested development about a show featuring two egotistical blowhards and their half-baked opinions about one of the least respected art-forms in the universe…but since I owe Gary Lactus a kidney, and The Beast Must Die has those photos of me….

So there’s the usual scheisse with the Silence! News and then there’s a verbal tsunami of comics reviews: Axe Cop, Dial H, Daredevil: End of Days, Action Comics, Legends of the Dark Knight, Fashion Beast, Crossed: Badlands, Animal Man, Swamp Thing, Tank Girl, Non-Humans (oh and there’s a discussion of headsocks, and the SILENCE! rules of comics are established).

Man Vs Comics makes it to the finish line with AVX, AVX: VS, and Uncanny X-Men and boy-howdy is he thrilled.

The SILENT! Question comes from Detective Chimp, and the answer involves a musical octopus amongst other things.

Add in Fuff #0 from uber-talented Jeffrey Lewis, and Lose #2 from sickeningly talented Michael DeForge in The Smallest Press, and you have an hour and a half of…of…oh god, that’s it I don’t care anymore. If you need me I’ll be out back crying with a gun in my mouth. WRITE YOUR OWN DAMN BLURB YOU PAIR OF HACKS!

click to download SILENCE!#34

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

 

Click below for some Jeffrey Lewis images in the SILENCE! GALLERY… Read the rest of this entry »

SILENCE! #17

June 12th, 2012

TOUCH ME, I’M SICK!

Behold SILENCERS, they’re back from the piddling interferences that waylaid them last week. Back to bring you comics chat like you JUST NEVER HEARD BEFORE! It’s SILENCE #17!

No songs this week, so get that thought out of your minds. Those twin 4-colour Liberace’s can’t just produce this stuff like musical milk from their creative udders you know…GAH!

But they do manage a bountiful, overstuffed SILENCE! news, before careering like the Dukes of Hazzard into a twelve car pile-up of comics. They discuss (get ready) Earth 2, Animal Man, Swamp Thing (both the current version and Alan Moore’s seminal run, in  a crow-barred in Beast’s Bargain Basement), Dial H, America’s Got Powers, Action Comics, Mud Man, Dan The Unharmable, Avenger’s Academy, Bill Watterson, Hulk, Stormwatch, JLI, Rocketeer Adventures, Journey Into Mystery, Superman Family Adventures, and The Walking Dead…

But wait! How could we forget the comics event of the Millennium???

The two take on the awesome genre-atomizing Watchmen 2: beyond Watchmen. And I think it would be fair to sat that those boys sure did have their brains fried!

Plus, Lactus works out the best way to review comics – by counting their panels.

Finally the Beast brings it home with a discussion (ie monologue) about the latest film from horror director Ti West, The Innkeepers in notcomics.

Now what rational person could want more from life? Don’t answer that!

And it’s all in the best POSSIBLE taste!

click to download

 

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SILENCE! podcast #6

March 14th, 2012

Behold cretins! The sixth mind-ripping installment of SILENCE! is upon us…

In this episode Lactus tries desperately to get off the smack, whilst continuing to loll about on his cosmic swank pad. Meanwhile the Beast has made some Amazing Friends. Matters takes a turn for the sobering as they discuss the sad passing of Moebius, and give an update on Brett Ewins‘ situation in Silence News. We also reveal the winner of our ‘competition’ to draw a picture of the ‘Thing’s Thing’. Then things get merry again as Lactus reveals he has read all the comics in the world due to a one-sided sponsorship deal with Dave’s Comics of Brighton. Beast sulks. The two 4-colour raconteurs then take in Action Comics, Animal Man, Swamp Thing, Fatale, OMAC, The Fairest, Age of Apocalypse, Stray Bullets, The Manhattan Projects and they both take their horrid medicine when they read Spawn issue no. 2,798,002 in the new feature You Should Have Known Better. The Beast takes a rambling digression into the career of Ralph Bakshi in the Not Comics section (so many sections!) before they delve into the upcoming releases in the Coming Attractions.

Oh yes, and Lactus misses his deadline for his Hulk song, but drops in a bit of live superhero stand-up to atone for his sins.

Could it be any better? Arguably yes, but you know what? THIS IS WHAT YOU’RE HAVING. MAN UP, GRAB YOUR EARS AND GET SOME!

[audio:https://mindlessones.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/silence006a.mp3]
Click to download

[audio:https://mindlessones.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/silence006b.mp3]
Click to download

[CLICK BELOW FOR IGMUS’s NSFW ‘COMPETITION’ WINNING DEPICTION OF THE THING’S THING!]

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Bobsy’s turn to bestow treats.  Zom is the lucky recipient of Swamp Thing # 60. This episode is also remarkable as we manage to get trapped in the room when the door knob breaks, adding a sense of real life drama to proceedings.
Click to download
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