Mindless Ones

I TOOK A TRAIN, I TOOK A PLANE…AH WHO CARES YOU ALWAYS END UP IN THE CITY

“You remind me of the babe!”

“What babe?”

“The babe with the power!”

“What power?”

“THE POWER TO MELT MEN’S BRAINS WITH IT’S EYES, TO REND THEIR SKIN FROM THEIR BONES WITH NARY A THOUGHT, THE POWER TO LEVEL CITIES WITH A BLINK, TOO MAKE A CHARNEL HOUSE OF THIS WORLD AND THE NEXT, TO TRAVEL OUT INTO THE STARS AND FURTHER AND TO BURN ANYTHING THAT GETS IN IT’S WAY…THAT POWER!”

“Oh. Well in that case I think you can keep that babe away from me. Nasty thing.”

<ITEM> LA HA BOO HA! It’s a new SILENCE!, the comics podcast with ‘tude to boot, and boots with ‘tude. Gary Lactus and The Beast Must Die bring you their thoughts, their opinions, their hopes, their dreams and they demand that you listen.

<ITEM> Sponsorship? Admin, Earth-Pigs? Self-promotion? Stand-up comedy? Take your pick, treacle, they’re all here

<ITEM> Into the Reviewniverse we go, with a hi-de-hi and a ho-de-ho! Despite The Beast forgetting himself and talking about the Brian Wilson biopic Love & Mercy, the boys do eventually talk about comics, including The Dark Knight: The Last Crusade, Batman no.1, Patsy Walker AKA Hellcat, DC Legends of Tomorrow (with Sugar & Spike), Island, Michael DeForge, Black Widow, Ted McKeever’s Pencil Head and more, oh so much more!

<ITEM> Laughing. About Laughing. And then not.

P.S. COME TO THIS IT WILL BE FUNNYYYYYYY!

Click to download SILENCE!#193

FUCK A JOHN WAYNE

 Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is sad to say that Gary Lactus is no longer with us…he is in Edinburgh doing some ‘stand-up’, ‘comedy’ mission. Ha ha, You thought that  Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 meant he was dead! Gullible meatbags.

But seriously I disintegrated him this morning.

So you get solo-Silence with The Beast Must Die – STOP CRYING! – as  Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735  was saying, you get solo-Silence. Boo-hoo , all better now.

<ITEM> a brand new one-off theme tune and a GOSH comics jingle? Surely you spoil us Beasty one..?

<ITEM> TBMD slot himself into The Reviewniverse to talk about some stuff, including Incredible Hulk, Catalyst Comix, Dial H (final issue), Prophet and a bit more too!

<ITEM> A small play depicting Matt Fraction and Howard Chaykin talking about Satellite Sam…? Stop, my beating diodes!

<ITEM> a long winded monologue about comics virtuoso Michel DeForge, taking in Lose no.5 and Very casual.

<ITEM> A personal message from Jesus no less

NO MORE ITEMS! Go away now and come back next time.  Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735  promises that you will get the Complete Deal, The Full Works, The Whole Kt and Kaboodle….The one true SILENCE!

click to download SILENCE!#73

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

WHERE THE HELL’S THE RZA??

SILENCE! no.34 is upon you. Gladness….oh what’s the point? Sometimes being an omnipresent disembodied narrator just isn’t enough y’know? I mean, I had dreams when I was younger – what happened to them? I wanted to be a dancer. I have thighs like a f*cking gazelle…and here I am making up a bunch of lies, to tell some degenerates in arrested development about a show featuring two egotistical blowhards and their half-baked opinions about one of the least respected art-forms in the universe…but since I owe Gary Lactus a kidney, and The Beast Must Die has those photos of me….

So there’s the usual scheisse with the Silence! News and then there’s a verbal tsunami of comics reviews: Axe Cop, Dial H, Daredevil: End of Days, Action Comics, Legends of the Dark Knight, Fashion Beast, Crossed: Badlands, Animal Man, Swamp Thing, Tank Girl, Non-Humans (oh and there’s a discussion of headsocks, and the SILENCE! rules of comics are established).

Man Vs Comics makes it to the finish line with AVX, AVX: VS, and Uncanny X-Men and boy-howdy is he thrilled.

The SILENT! Question comes from Detective Chimp, and the answer involves a musical octopus amongst other things.

Add in Fuff #0 from uber-talented Jeffrey Lewis, and Lose #2 from sickeningly talented Michael DeForge in The Smallest Press, and you have an hour and a half of…of…oh god, that’s it I don’t care anymore. If you need me I’ll be out back crying with a gun in my mouth. WRITE YOUR OWN DAMN BLURB YOU PAIR OF HACKS!

click to download SILENCE!#34

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

Click below for some Jeffrey Lewis images in the SILENCE! GALLERY… Read the rest of this entry »