Mindless Ones

I used to have a friend who would perform his own peculiar brand of dance: DANCE FIGHTING

EXTREME RUBBISH!

I’ll let you in on a secret.

Every time a Geoff Jeans’ (his new name*) mega-event comes around, I know, just know, that this time, forget all the other times, I’m going to enjoy it. See, I understand the allure of holidaying in the DCU. There’s all those superpeople with all their superpowers, the tangled web of all those relationships and history. There’s The supernatural, outer-space, the far future… It sounds great on paper doesn’t it? Well that’s just it, IT’S NOT GREAT ON PAPER. IT’S SHIT ON PAPER.

Find out why after the jump

A short, compressed piece on memory and Enid Coleslaw.

Falling…falling…..

Quickie number 1

PREVIOUSLY IN BATMAN AND ROBIN 666….

In the aftermath of the Sensei’s attack on Nu-Gotham and a near lethal , three pronged assault on their friends by super-assassins contracted by one of the shadowy forces vying for control of the city, Batman and Robin are forced to make some tough decisions.

With his secret identity compromised and Lucius Fox hospitalised by the dreadful killer Action Figure, Damian Wayne decides its time to go public and unmask.

It’s the morning after the last of the assassins was defeated and most of the team are shored up in Bat Mountain, Batman’s hidden fortress folded into the architecture of Wayne Tower, but Nico the puppy-girl and new recruit Judah Runningdog are starting to get restless…..

This is what happens next….

One thing I’ve tried to remain aware of when writing this review is that I’m basically a twat. Seriously. TBMD and Zom can ignore all the interviews and promo art – why can’t I? There’s a huge section of fandom out there who’ve had all this issue’s surprises spoiled for them, and it turns out I’m one of them. But there’s always hope; at least I haven’t changed my screen name to BRUCE WAYNE IS THE REAL BATMAN (I AM THE BATMAN) yet. No, my fandom hasn’t begun to occlude any enjoyment I may take from Batrob whatsoever, however I’d better start reigning it in if I’m going to do Grant’s new run any justice in my write-ups.

How would I feel about it all if I’d come to # 1 fresh?

Hmmm…..

PREVIOUSLY IN BATMAN AND ROBIN 666….

In the aftermath of the Sensei’s attack on Gotham city and a near lethal , three pronged assault on their friends by super-assassins contracted by one of the shadowy forces vying for control of Nu-Gotham, Batman and Robin are forced to make some tough decisions.

With his secret identity compromised and Lucius Fox hospitalised by the dreadful killer Action Figure, Damian Wayne decides its time to go public and unmask.

It’s the morning after the last of the assassins was defeated and most of the team are shored up in Bat Mountain, Batman’s hidden fortress folded into the architecture of Wayne Tower.

This is what happens next….

Click here to read the rest of the run

And so ends our second story arc. We don’t have a wait for the trade philosophy round here so enough gets answered that it’s a satisfying conclusion, but we leave enough shit dangling to keep you coming back for the mega-story. If you’ve been following us since the beginning you’ll be used to all the weird tonal shifts by now and this episode’s absolutely no exception. I gather Morrison’s going to be using Professor Pyg in his new Batman book so as of now this stuff is officially NOT CANON. Not unless Grant secretly loves this non-run and plays along, which I doubt. I’m playing in his sandpit afterall. And, of course, that’s been one of the themes of this arc.  Seriously, though, in some ways I’ve, completely naively, started to feel as though these characters belong to me, and it does sting a bit to be reminded that they absolutely don’t, so forgive me if I feel a little sad. I’m looking forward to Morrison’s new bat-arc as much as anyone, but it’s a shame to see *my* Robin relegated to a pile of bad guys for Batman to beat on.

And that’s the other thing: I suppose by this time it’s become clear that this book is as much about Alice Dodgeson as it is about Damian Wayne. I think I always saw 666 as a team effort, but that doesn’t mean I’m not aware that Damian really needs some time to shine on his own and I’ve factored that into my future plans, so hopefully I’m heading off any complaints some of you might have at the pass. Though I’ll also be spending some issues focusing really closely on some of the supporting cast too, one of whom may come as something of a surprise. These last two arcs have really been about world building and setting the scene both tonally and narratively for what comes afterwards. So, sure, they’re overflowing with crazy vehicles, virtual reality, lynchian conceits and toy guns, maybe to the point of overkill, but now it’s all firmly lodged in place, I can take my hands off the throttle a bit and Nu Gotham can relax into a different kind of pace.

So anyway, let’s forget about all that for now and join Batman and Robin as they face down the combined might of the Black Rabbit and Action Figure. One last time before the continuity hounds start screaming Elseworlds!’

Infesticons transwarm!

It’s four years after the events of Batman 666, and Batman, aided and abetted by a new Robin (a re-wired Dollatron: Damian Wayne’s best pal, supertank and portable batcomputer rolled into one), Ace the Batmobile (half bat-themed Godzilla, half mobile fortress with a detachable head that doubles up as a car) and the kind of technology one would more commonly find in an Ian M Banks novel find themselves battling a new breed of villain in a city teetering on the edge of madness.

The Gotham of tomorrow is a fusion of all its previous incarnations: the playground, the gothic wonderland and the hardboiled urban sprawl. Half its population have floated away into it’s virtual reality suburb, Toytown, and a sizeable percentage of the DCU’s magical community have relocated to its outer fringes. Then there’s the influx of other even weirder immigrants from as near as the Plateau of Leng and as far away as 3,000000,00000,000000000 BC. Throw in the increased degeneration of the natural environment globally, just for good measure, and the city’s beginning to feel like a pressure cooker, where all the lunacy confined to Arkham in bygone years is spilling out. Gotham’s certainly at the centre of something, it’s just that, as yet, nobody seems to have any idea what that might mean.

In the first story arc, Snake Charmer, the Sensei unleashed a reality virus programmed to destroy Toytown and cripple the city by plunging its users/inhabitants into an apocalyptic virtual world in which the new Batman never existed. This virtual assault threatened to fry the brains of Gotham’s online citizenry, until Batman and Robin managed to rewrite the virus’s programming from inside the virtual hell, turning it against its makers and preventing the Sensei and his wife, Agrat Bat Malhat, from detonating a nuke in the city’s docklands. Why did the Sensei decide to show his hand after all this time? Nobody knows, but it’s clear he had a hidden agenda. The word on the street is: ‘apocalypse’.

A BIT MORE PREAMBLE AFTER THE JUMP