Mindless Ones

I’M GOING TO FAST! I GOT NO BREAKS ON MY ROLLER SKATES!

Hi, come this way, that’s right, just through here.  Now, our first exhibit is this collection of bricks.  As you can see there’s five in total.  Two of them are the same and one of them is made of latex.  That’s right! It’s a stunt brick!  Then over here we have a wooden duck painted like Superman, right next to this wide-necked plastic bottle with some piss in it.  Well that’s it.  I hope you’ve enjoyed your tour of the Museum of Gary Lactus.  Oh, I almost forgot, here we have a classic blurb written by the human disappointment himself.

Two men!  One pod!  Some saucy innuendo!  Some sentences ending in exclamation marks!  After a break, Gary Lactus and The Beast Must Die reacquaint themselves with a bit of chat about Douglas Noble and pal’s A Pocket Chiller series, not doing comedy and an imaginary space battle between billionaires.

Then it’s off to a bumper Reviewniverse with Simon Hanselmann’s Crisis Zone, Jack Teagle’s Collected Madness, Fight! and Teagle Comics, Cinema Purgatorio, Nick Edwards’ It Had To Be You, Doctor Tom Brent – Young Intern, Battle, Walls’ Chill, Sean Azzopardi, Orphan and the Five Beasts, Mr. Men and Battle Action Force of course.

Then it’s away but not before you are urged to buy John McRea’s stuff to help him through a pretty devastating bout of long covid.

See you next week!

@frasergeesin

@thebeastmustdie

[email protected]

Hey Kids – Stop snogging and listen to me!

Silence is back! And it’s smaller, longer and more claustrophobic than ever before! Welcome to The Temple of Lactus where the atoms of reality are comics and batman really is the god of my two fathers.

Cursing silver, Das Biest Muss Sterben drags his bloody pelt through the wilds of the black forest gateau and has NO TIME FOR PODCASTING, LOSERS. This means: homely, hirsute but dutiful farmer’s daughter Bobsy is kidnapped from his cosy homestead and forced into the servitude of the Spacelord and his menagerie of wives (x1) sons (x1) and cats (x2).

They strip down to their essentials and get down to business. Their business is comic book reviews and business is in no particular order –

Magpie 1&2, Triskelion 5 – Kathryn Briggs
The Cleaner 4 – Fraser Geesin
Rok of the Reds 1-3 – Wagner, Grant and Cornwell
Reads 4 – Avery Hill Publishing
Berserker 1 – Breakdown Press
Battle Action Force – Major Black
Here come the beautiful people and Counting Stones – Douglas Noble
Prismatik Man 1 – Stathis Tsemberlidis
Stone Focus and Propagation of… – Lando
STEELBLADE 1 by Steven Steelblade
Into the Black by Benjy Goldsmith and Cicy Reay
Generation Gone 1-3 – Ales Kot and Andre Lima Araujo
What is Left – Rosmary V-O
Mr. Higgins Comes Home – Mike Mignola and Warwick Johnson-Cadwell
Kid Lobotomy – Peter Milligan and Tess Fowler

@silencepod

@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie
@bobsymindless
@kellykanayama
[email protected]

WRAP MY TONGUE ROUND A BUMBLEBEE MOUTH

…strange news from a distant star incoming… beaming live transmissions from the satellite heart… set..set the controls for… the blackstar … we are one nation, a nation of millions, one nation under a groove…  it takes…millions… of nations… this is major… can you hear me… can you hear me…?

<ITEM> What? Who? Why? HOW?

It’s only a right rowdy ruddy great episode of SILENCE!

<ITEM> But hark? Where is the Space God? While Gary Lactus scrubs his helmet and prepares for his one-man war on comedy, The Beast Must Die is joined by Lord Nuneaton Savage for a special edition of SILENCE! Expect ramblings from beyond the stars…

<ITEM> Some sponsorship, including news on the great Comics & Book Exchange in Notting Hill. Savage also talks up his musical shanigans with the mighty meaty Teeth Of The Sea. The Beast Must Die Also Talks About Cerebus Again.

<ITEM> Sound the harmoniums and set the synths to stun as we enter The Reviewniverse with a swing in our step and a jaunt in our hearts. But wait! What’s this? The RETROVIEWNIVERSE??? Hold tight as we explore the highways and byways of longform comics rambling… taking in a whole damn bunch of stuff including, but not limited to Madballs, Transformers Vs GI Joe, Miami Vice Remix, toyetic indies comics in general, Ben Marra, Gi joe, Battle Action Force, Film /Comic Adaptations, Tim Burton’s Batman, Peter Milligan, The Programme, The E, aters, Shade The Changing Man, The Extremist, Bix Barton: Master Of The Rum & Uncanny, mike Baron’s The Butcher, and believe me when I say a whole lot more…Oh and The Beast Must Die Also Talks About Cerebus Again.

<ITEM> A special guest appearance from Dave & Emily and then it’s off, out and up. It’s an hour plus of stream of consciousness comics chat just the way you ordered it. So get stuck in.

click to download SILENCE!#185

SEE HER FACE EVERY DAY, SEE HER FACE IT DOESN’T HELP ME

What is that thing? Wait a minute that’s disgusting. But nonetheless there it is. There it is indeed, sat in the corner looking at you. What the hell is it? Who does it think it is? Does anyone know? Can anyone tell me? Wait a minute…it’s opening it’s mouth. God, look at it’s teeth, they’re like tombstones in a haunted graveyard. Revolting. I’m disgusted. I shan’t pay it a second more of my attention. I’m turning the other way. I’m looking away. How dare that thing ruin my day with it’s…OH GOD IT’S IN FRONT OF ME AGAIN… IT’S ON MY FACE, IT’S TRYING TO BITE MY EYES…WHAT IZZZZZ IT….!??

It’s SILENCE! of course. And Jumpin’ Jiminy Crizzmass it’s a podcast that comes to you by the skin of the hair on it’s teeth…. Not to spoil anything but Gary Lactus deserves a medal for being here for this one, but we’ll let him tell that particular tale. It’s all part of the podcast that walks like a baboon but think it’s a fancy country squire.

<ITEM> Traumatic Life Event! Star-studded Sponsorship! Guest-filled admin! SMASH! Biblical references! EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!

<ITEM>But always rely on the Reviewniverse to clasp you to its multi-coloured breast and feed you nurturing comics juice.  Along with the Liefeld of the Land, we have Code Pru, The Eighthe Seal, Paper Girls, Saga, Uber, Mercury Heat, Klaus, Johnny Red, Battle, Battle Action Force, Storm Force and a whole hootenanny more.

Now come on. We’ve all had a bit too much excitemence. Let’s grab some ginger tea and have a nice sit down. Shhhh!

click to download SILENCE!#175