Mindless Ones

I’M GOING TO FAST! I GOT NO BREAKS ON MY ROLLER SKATES!

Hi, come this way, that’s right, just through here.  Now, our first exhibit is this collection of bricks.  As you can see there’s five in total.  Two of them are the same and one of them is made of latex.  That’s right! It’s a stunt brick!  Then over here we have a wooden duck painted like Superman, right next to this wide-necked plastic bottle with some piss in it.  Well that’s it.  I hope you’ve enjoyed your tour of the Museum of Gary Lactus.  Oh, I almost forgot, here we have a classic blurb written by the human disappointment himself.

Two men!  One pod!  Some saucy innuendo!  Some sentences ending in exclamation marks!  After a break, Gary Lactus and The Beast Must Die reacquaint themselves with a bit of chat about Douglas Noble and pal’s A Pocket Chiller series, not doing comedy and an imaginary space battle between billionaires.

Then it’s off to a bumper Reviewniverse with Simon Hanselmann’s Crisis Zone, Jack Teagle’s Collected Madness, Fight! and Teagle Comics, Cinema Purgatorio, Nick Edwards’ It Had To Be You, Doctor Tom Brent – Young Intern, Battle, Walls’ Chill, Sean Azzopardi, Orphan and the Five Beasts, Mr. Men and Battle Action Force of course.

Then it’s away but not before you are urged to buy John McRea’s stuff to help him through a pretty devastating bout of long covid.

See you next week!

@frasergeesin

@thebeastmustdie

si************@gm***.com

SILENCE! Man’s oldest friend. Since time immemorial began throughout history it has been SILENCE! which has fed our children, built our houses, lit our fires and shoed our horses. Welcome to what is probably the single most essential issue of SILENCE! ever. Gary Lactus and Bobsy talk a load of balls, discuss SILENCE! LIVE #2 (to be held May 11th at the same place as last time, tell us in the comments if you’re up for it) and create some Slash Fiction///./../../..>>>>>##””’][=-`

‘;#.,/=-p][p’ITEM This has never happened before! Gary and Bobsy are both posting simultaneously and the streams are getting crossed!!! Gary had this chill- ironic narrator thing going, see above, but bobsy was going to do a bit about that show about the Mormon wives, and the guys with all the unhappy wives? Gary is the dumb guy who has to remember four wedding anniversaries per annum and TBMD, Maid of Nails, bobsy and co are all his babymakers who all loathe each other? It was gonna be a bit like that.

ITEM Bobsy didn’t really know where this was going to go however, so he started writing the end first and hoped a good bit for the start would come to him while he was going along. It to be honest, hadn’t…

ITEM And then the thing with the crossed streams happened which saved bobsy’s bacon quite a bit. Good old Gary: it’s his spaceship, we just float in it.

ITEM Then Gary and his third, or is it his seventh, fave wife have a great TV news section they didn’t have the presence of mind to call Silence! Because I’m trying to watch the telly and they say stuff about Legion and Samurai Jack.

ITEM Death is gripped as the celestially betrothed and cosmically neglected couple pair bond and enter the Reviewniverse! where they talk about the comics time of course: Inhumans Prime, Xmen Prime,  Lone Wolf and Cub, Galaxy of Brutality: Space Riders, Spider Woman, Black Widow, Rick and Morty, Cinema Purgatorio and Detective Comics.

ITEM that’s it G you can do the podcast embed now:

ITEM Right you are, Bobsy.

@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie
@bobsymindless
@theQuietusFilm
@kellykanayama


si************@gm***.com

With my left hand free and I’m on TV
(Getting the lyrics wrong makes Junior very cross)

What would you do with a squillion dollars?

Imagine a bath full of Kryptonian Shagg Juice. Drifting Gotham’s corners in the ride Batman turned down becaude the mileage was bad. Wearing a power ring jot because you have great willpower, but because you have great ca$h and that’s a lot more cool.

THESE are the questions asked towards the end of this you-might-just-die epicisode of Silence #216

I honestly can’t even. We start I think with a good review from Gary of the new Loganverine movie. He has much feels about the film and it is lovely.

The spoilers in his review actually make the boy bobsy a little upset so be careful out there.

Evench our critiqueonauts enter the Reviewniverse, where they review a lot of comics including Crime Destroyer (a very very good comic), Champions, Hawkeye, America, Royal City, Extremity, Savage Things, CIABatman, Cinema Purgatorio, and possibly some other stuff. I’ve forgotten. No, really I actually think that’s it. It’s a long one. The CIA Batman bit is great and we nearly nearly solve all the world’s problems by distributing Bruce Wayne’s cash. It’s great, we nearly sort it all out but playtime endeth and dinner calls.

Byeee! Love you xxx

@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie
@bobsymindless
@theQuietusFilm
@kellykanayama


si************@gm***.com

GUNBOATS FLOAT LIKE CEMETERIES, INSIDE YOUR GUITAR

Gary Lactus & The Beast Must Die in a dance off that you just won’t believe! Throwing shapes that could change the fabric of space and reality! It’s time to step up to the streets, in 3D, in full effect! Those boys were thrown out of home when they were 15 and they been dancing ever since! Nobody puts SILENCE! in the corner! NOBODY!!! (and break)

<ITEM> It’s an old skool spektacliar, as Gary Lactus & The Beast Must Die hold hands and touch the sky together! Crazy guys – back in action!

<ITEM> Sponsorship? Check. Ramblocious ramblings? Check. A Kickstarter campaign worth your time? Check. Earth-Pig update? Check.

<ITEM> And then we’re hard into the Reviewniverse like a couple of bouncing bombc skipping across the 4-colour fjords. Looking at Batman: Rebirth, DC Rebirth, Superman: Rebirth, and DC Afterbirth. Plus! Civil War 2, Spiderwoman, Stray Bullets, Cinema Purgatorio, Stuart Gordon’s From Beyond, Papergirls and more, more, more (how do you like me?)

<ITEM> Bit of backmin and then we ‘re off!

Click to download SILENCE!#191

LET EM KNOW I’M LOOKING FOR A BIG FAT DOPE SACK WITH ENDS TO SPEND

Did you know that it’s Free Comic Book Life this life? Well it is: all comics are free in this life – and who’s to say about the next? – thanks to the generosity of Mr Stan Lee, an adorably uncley sort who invented the medium we call comic books and all the superheroes so beloved of your local multiplex.

But in a life of free comics, comics unchained and in flight, comics whose parole board hearing finally came through, comics who finally managed to dig that hole and jump over the fence, comics comics fripping everywhere, in a life full of free comics how are you going to pick the right ones to read?

Don’t worry your pretty little head or your ugly old mug about it, because Gary and the Beast, except not the Beast, are here again to tell you what the good comics are in another roar-ripping episode of SILENCE!

<ITEM> Adminism at the top of the show: sponsorshizzle and eff see bee dee news.

<ITEM> Then in probably the best thing to have happened to this podcast in a call code for an LA homicide of shows, Mr Carter’s Math(s) Class use their angelic tones to in unison open The Reviewniverse – an imaginary place – aren’t they all hmm, hmm?  – where comics are talked of. Gary and NotBeast bash their heads on Tom Gauld’s Mooncop, Alan Moore’s Cinema Purgatorio, Becky Cloonan’s The Punisher, Kaare Kyle Andrews’ Renato Jones The One%, Black Mask’s 4 Kids Walk Into A Bank, the telly license payer’s Dr Who and perhaps not much more.

<ITEM> Oh and Captain America: Civil War – we talked about that in there too but I can’t remember if it was before the comics or not.

<ITEM> Sorry! Thanks love you!

Click to download SILENCE!#187

Contact us:

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@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie
@bobsymindless
This edition of SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the greatest comics shop on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton. It’s also sponsored the greatest comics shop on the planet GOSH! Comicsof London.