Mindless Ones

I’M GOING TO FAST! I GOT NO BREAKS ON MY ROLLER SKATES!

Hi, come this way, that’s right, just through here.  Now, our first exhibit is this collection of bricks.  As you can see there’s five in total.  Two of them are the same and one of them is made of latex.  That’s right! It’s a stunt brick!  Then over here we have a wooden duck painted like Superman, right next to this wide-necked plastic bottle with some piss in it.  Well that’s it.  I hope you’ve enjoyed your tour of the Museum of Gary Lactus.  Oh, I almost forgot, here we have a classic blurb written by the human disappointment himself.

Two men!  One pod!  Some saucy innuendo!  Some sentences ending in exclamation marks!  After a break, Gary Lactus and The Beast Must Die reacquaint themselves with a bit of chat about Douglas Noble and pal’s A Pocket Chiller series, not doing comedy and an imaginary space battle between billionaires.

Then it’s off to a bumper Reviewniverse with Simon Hanselmann’s Crisis Zone, Jack Teagle’s Collected Madness, Fight! and Teagle Comics, Cinema Purgatorio, Nick Edwards’ It Had To Be You, Doctor Tom Brent – Young Intern, Battle, Walls’ Chill, Sean Azzopardi, Orphan and the Five Beasts, Mr. Men and Battle Action Force of course.

Then it’s away but not before you are urged to buy John McRea’s stuff to help him through a pretty devastating bout of long covid.

See you next week!

@frasergeesin

@thebeastmustdie

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Presented here is a recording of SILENCE! To Astonish! form Thought Bubble 2021 with descriptive narration for the more visual elements of the original presentation. Our humble thanks and sincere apologies to Rachel Stott, Becky Cloonan, Al Ewing and Hannah Berry.

Welcome to a very special SILENCE! in which two masters of the craft sit down in conversation with each other. Gary Lactus and The Beast Must Die have somehow managed to secure Dan White and Fraser Geesin for an in-depth chat about their latest comics.

Terminus is White’s collection of his acclaimed weekly cartoon for Mindless Ones in glorious hardback form.

Purple Hate Balloon floats into view as Geesin collaborates successfully with animator Laurie Rowan.

Cindy and Biscuit: Year One takes us back in time to Cindy’s first battles with all things monstrous in a beautiful, un-dislikeable tabloid newspaper format.

The two legendary geniuses will be debuting these life-changing, earth-shattering, germ-killing comics at Thought Bubble on the 13th and 14th of November 2021, on tables 27B-28   Mindless Ones And SILENCE! And Pals in the Comixology Originals Hall.  Their comics will be available from their websites once this crazy weekend is over.

IT KEPT TALKING SO I PUT IT IN THE LAUNDRY

Oh cripes! Sorry, yes, erm… of course, yes, no quite right, yes, hmm… Gosh, what to do, what to do… Oh blimey, sorry, I wasn’t prepared for this, ah, um, as you can probably tell! Haha! Ahem, right, yes. Okay, right… Ah, yes! Right then, here we go… Blurb.

Forget about the hot shit in your pants, that can wait. THIS can’t. It’s SILENCE! time!

The two buddy pals, Gary Lactus and The Beast Must Be Regretting Not Choosing A Shorter Name By Now are back to talk about whatever they bloody well like as long as it kinda relates to comics (or not).

<ITEM> The usual Thought Bubble preparation, anticipation and panic.

<ITEM> Halloween japes of yore.

<ITEM> Come with us to Reviewniverse, with  Blocks by Oliver East, The Mighty Crusaders, Pride and Joy, Second Coming and The Comics Journal of course.

<ITEM> off to bed, but not before some Reckymends of stuff like Taskmaster New Zealand and podcasts such as The Weird Rap Podcast, the Cartoonist Kayfabe Frank Quitely Interview and good, long enthuse over List Off.

@frasergeesin

@thebeastmustdie

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SONG LYRICS HERE

Look, do you want a blurb or a podcast? You can’t have both.

Gary Lactus and The Beast Must Die are back together. It’s a sad occasion as comedian and SILENCE! contributor, Phil Jerrod has passed away.  This month’s Patreon money plus extra will be going to Sarcoma UK.  Perhaps you’d consider sponsoring Julie Oliver and Phil Lucas as they run in his memory.

https://justgiving.com/team/teamjerrodtoo

Anyway, there’s other stuff here. Gary tells you about his absence, The Beast recommends the One Day In America documentary and both of them decide to maybe think about getting ready for Thought Bubble.  There’s a bit of Neighbours chat in there too, sadly and inevitably.

Come with us to Reviewniverse, with Kane & Able, Superman and The Authority, God Of Tremors, The Extreme Self and The Age Of Earthquakes by Douglas Coupland and Room For Love of course.

Stop!  Look!   Listen!

@frasergeesin

@thebeastmustdie

[email protected]

Here’s the 2nd episode of STAR RIDER!  Will you telephone Andre Yeats?  Will your relationship with Richard deepen?  Will you finally get a bloody drink?!  Find out here!

This was previously only available to members of C-Unit, the crack team of special elite laser force warriors who fund the SILENCE! Channel on Patreon.

Series one has ended and Dan and Fraser are now onto book two, Riddle Of The Runaway.  If you’d like to catch up on what has turned out to be the most fun Dan and Fraser have had in ages, you know where to go and what to do.

Normal SILENCE! should descend soon, thank you for your patience.

Gary Lactus and The Beast Must Die are currently buried under a mountain of life turds. To fill the gap, please enjoy this first episode of Dan And Fraser’s Starlight Adventures in which we navigate the world of horses in Star Rider, the first Starlight Adventure game books for girls from 1985. This was previously only available to members of C-Unit, the crack team of special elite laser force warriors who fund the SILENCE! Channel on Patreon.

Series one has ended and Dan and Fraser are now onto book two, Riddle Of The Runaway. If you’d like to catch up on what has turned out to be the most fun Dan and Fraser have had in ages, you know where to go and what to do.

Normal SILENCE! should descend soon, thank you for your patience.

@frasergeesin

@thebeastmustdie

[email protected]

YOU’RE JUST TOO TOO OBSCURE FOR ME, YOU DON’T REALLY GET THROUGH TO ME

OVER HERE!  MAN ON!  IN THE BOX!  CROSS IT  ONTO MY HEAD MY OLD SUNSHINE! WHAT WAS THAT?!  WHERE ARE YOUR SPECS, REF?!

Ah, Footblurb.  The beautiful game.

<ITEM>WELL, THIS WAS A MASSIVE PAIN IN THE ARSE TO EDIT!

<ITEM>Having said that, it was a delight for The Beast Must Die and Gary Lactus to welcome Dan Cox and John Riordon for a reasonably informal wag of chins.

<ITEM>But it’s not entirely informal, as Danny and Johnny, the Hitsville Brothers tell us tales of their experiences of running the Hitsville UK Kickstarter.  

<ITEM>Inevitably, everything falls apart as the SILENCE!#295 experience becomes one of listening in to the rambling chat of the four men on the table next to yours.  What kind of men are these?  What drives them?  What interests them?  Well, in short:  Jeff Bezos, their children’s relationships with super heroes, cosplay families, their dream Strontium Dog TV show and the music documentaries King Rocker, The Chills: The Triumph And Tragedy Of Martin Phillips and the Tina Turner doc, Tina.  Oh, and Timmy Capello.

<ITEM>Anyone read any comics?  Well sort of.  There’s talk of Danny Hitsville’s Chris Claremont Completion Crusade, Paul Jon Milne’s Grave Horticulture, the forthcoming Pocket Chiller Speckle and Ash, Gareth Brookes’ The Dancing Plague, Gareth Hopkins‘ Ghosts In Things, LDN by Ramzee, Jim Woodring’s Jabba The Hutt and Thriller.

<ITEM>Finally there’s some reckymends, namely List Off, Three Bean Salad, The Office US, Laser Fart and, (as usual) Chart Music.

<ITEM> In long:

@frasergeesin

@thebeastmustdie

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NOW IS THE TIME AND THE TIME IS NOW FOR OUR CHILDREN TO ASK FOR THE WORLD, LIFE’S UNREASONABLE, DEMAND THE IMPOSSIBLE

DID YOU KNOW?  Sharks can smell London from space!

DID YOU KNOW?  If you remove the sax breaks from every 80s song, the 80s actually only last for 7 years!

DID YOU KNOW?  This is actually a blurb!

<ITEM> It’s another episode of SILENCE!.  You know the sort of thing to expect.  Lots of talk about Hanson.

<ITEM> The Beast Must Die unboxes a load of stuff in a very special The Beast Unboxes

<ITEM>  Gary Lactus has also picked up a Lorne Bomb.

<ITEM>  Come with us to Reviewniverse, with The Young Lawyers, LOEG Tempest, Monsters, Girl and Silverblade of course.

@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie

[email protected]