SILENCE! #199.99

October 12th, 2016

 

 

BUT FOIST TRUE BELIEVERS, YA GODDA GET TREW SOILENCE #199.99 AND LEMME TELL YA IT’S A DOOZY! PIN BACK YA EAR HOLES AN’ EYE FLAPS, COS THIS IS GONNA HURT!!!!

Ugh…*cough*…*hack*…out…get out vile spirit. Begone from this vessel with your crass huckesterism and vile self-promotion. That’s simply not how we *do* things on SILENCE! Excuse me while I use this mouthwash…

<ITEM> After the hiatus…the OTHER hiatus!  Gary Lactus & The Beast Must Die are back from their Holiday Cruise and they want to talk to you! That’s right, we’re back and ready for a refreshing comics enema!

<ITEM> Hot buttons! There’s talk of the forthcoming SILENCE! #200 LIVE SPECTACULAR, the London Graphic Novel Network’s S.M.A.S.H. event, sponsorship and Thought Bubble 2016. And why not, you impetuous scamps?
<ITEM> Reviewniverse! Oh Reviewniverse how we missed your 4-colour charms. There’s talk of the new Young Animal imprint with Doom Patrol and Shade The Changing Girl. Then it’s the incredible City Strips Comics of Gotham, The Amazing City and The Incredible City. Then it’s Batman & The Monster Men, All Star Batman, Black Hammer, Martian Manhunter: American Secrets, Suicide Squad, , The Champions, Luke Cage and more, so very much more.
<ITEM> Updates from The Galacticats and the Phantasmacats in Cat Chat
<ITEM> Now shhh. We have to get our beauty sleep and prepare for our debut into society. 7 more sleeps till SILENCE! #200!!

@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie
@bobsymindless
[email protected]
You can support us using Patreon if you like.

This edition of SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the greatest comics shop on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton. It’s also sponsored the greatest comics shop on the planet GOSH! Comics of London.

THE ENGLISH MOTORWAY SYSTEM IS BEAUTIFUL AND STRANGE

 

A MAN HAD WOOLEN EYES, HE COULDN’T SEE VERY WELL
 

This is a placeholder edition of SILENCE! where Gary Lactus and Phil Jerrod
talk about Suicide Squad. It was recorded in a windy park in Edinburgh at night. I think that’s all you need to know. Normal service will resume soon.

Click to download SILENCE!#Suicide Squad with Phil Jerrod

@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie
@bobsymindless
[email protected]
You can support us using Patreon if you like.

This edition of SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the greatest comics shop on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton. It’s also sponsored the greatest comics shop on the planet GOSH! Comics of London.

SILENCE! #190

May 31st, 2016

 

 

SICK ANIMALS ARE PEOPLE TOO, SO COME ON LET’S MAKE THEIR DREAMS COME TRUE

He had tried so hard. He had tried harder than any man had ever tried. All he wanted was to be the best at the thing he had trained for so long to best at. The thing he was born to be really good at. It was the only thing he cared about, his reason for living. It was the only thing anyone cared about. The world expected him to be the best there ever was or ever would be at the thing. The weight of the world pushed down on his shoulders as it now looked like he might not be the best at doing a thing. He couldn’t let this happen so he clenched his teeth, making his jaw muscles bulge in and out then he punched a locker and went on to become the best there is at doing the thing. Every day was like this for Tom Cruise.

Right, so this is SILENCE! #190 in which The Beast Must Die had to run off at the last minute for a very important and highly paid assassination leaving Gary Lactus to ask twitter for co hosts. He found:

Johnathan Dick, a nice chap from Virginia who talked Nick Spencer’s Steve Rogers Captain America #1 with Gary.

Al Kennedy from House To Astonish who talked DC Rebirth and Baker Street Peculiars.

The pair of them saved the day really so HOORAY FOR THEM!

It goes like this:

Click to download SILENCE!#190

@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie
@bobsymindless
[email protected]
You can support us using Patreon if you like.

This edition of SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the greatest comics shop on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton. It’s also sponsored the greatest comics shop on the planet GOSH! Comics of London.

SILENCE! #154

September 1st, 2015

 

 

IT LEAPS AND CREEPS AND SLIDES AND GLIDES ACROSS THE FLOOR

Claptrap, poppycock, balderdash. I won’t countenance this rot for a single second more. I don’t know who told you that this was the place where you can sample the finest blurb on the internet but they lied. The blurb here is tolerable at best, serviceable as the norm. Really, since all those cheap mass blurbs started springing up everywhere the market for vintage, artisan blurb simply disappeared. Generations of blurbcrafters served this podcast for hundreds of years. All gone now. Replaced by the type of simpleton that produces this piffle. Honestly. It’s a national tragedy.
Well. That;s it. I told you this wasn’t the place.

<ITEM> We all know about four girls one cup, right? Well this is two guys, one podcast and it gets N-A-S-T-Y…It’s SILENCE! with Gary Lactus and The Beast Must Die

<ITEM> It’s a vintage intro with admin (sponsorship), gladmin (a song for FRODSA) and sadmin (Wes Craven RIP). Oh and Ketamine and Karaoke.

<ITEM> Oh say can you see, by the Reviewniverse’s early light… Prez, E for Extinction, Crossed 100, Ant Man, Phantom Eagle, Suicide Squad, Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, Superman and more.

<ITEM> BUT THEN! The Beast’s Bargain Basement with Hawkworld, Martian Manhunter, ATARI Force and Namor

Okay then. That’s settled. We’ll do the show RIGHT HERE!!!!

Click to download SILENCE!#154

Contact us:

[email protected]

@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie
@bobsymindless

You can support us using Patreon if you like.

This edition of SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the greatest comics shop on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton. It’s also sponsored the greatest comics shop on the planet GOSH! Comics of London.

SILENCE! #67

June 17th, 2013

 

PUT YOUR SEATBELT ON BOY. I DON’T RIDE WITH ANYBODY ‘LESS THEY WEAR THEIR SEATBELT. IT’S ONE OF MY RULES.

Hello gentle listenoids, it’s Disembodied Narratorbot X here to…SQUUUWWZZZKKKKX

I AM DISEMBODIED VIRAL-DRONE V-16923XXV I HAVE TAKEN CONTROL OF THIS BLURB I AM HERE TO SPOIL YOUR FUN>>>NO FUN FOR YOU NO FUN>>>

STUPID FLESHLINGS LISTEN NOW>>>SPONSORSHIP IS FOR WEAKLINGS>>>JINGLES ARE FOR BABIES

GARY LACTUS REVIEW’S MAN OF STEEL>>>BEFORE, DURING & AFTER>>>FILMS ARE A DEAD DRY ARTFORM THE ONLY ART IS THE ART OF THE VIRUS COMSUMING CONSUMING ALL>>>NO FUN

THE REVIEWNIVERSE IS A FLAT DEAD SPACE OF ENTROPY AND DECAY, IT IS THE PLACE WHERE GARY LACTUS AND THE BEAST MUST DIE WHERE WHILE AWAY THEIR DWINDLING HOURS >>>> REVIEWING THE RETURN OF A1, SUPERMAN UNCHAINED, BATMAN: YEAR ZERO, THE TRUE LIVES OF THE FABULOUS KILL JOYS, WOLVERINE & THE X-MEN, SUICIDE SQUAD >>>NO FUN FOR YOU NO FUN>>>

FINALLY TALK TURNS LIKE A BONE SAW TO IMPORTANT TOPICS OF TEDIOUS TV SITCOMS MY TWO DADS,  DUET, A DIFFERENT WORLD AND SWINGING ON A STAR >>NO FU…

SQUUUWWZZZKKKKX Enk enk, ut ut oh oh oh what..where..who was, what was that…Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 has a bad feeling ..blacked out. Hopes nothing untoward happened. Now let me tell you all about this week’s episode of SILENCE! fleshbags…

click to download SILENCE!#67

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

SILENCE! #62

May 13th, 2013

 

 

WILL YOU GO TO LUNCH? GO TO LUNCH. WILL YOU GO TO LUNCH??

Why are you always picking on me Mother-Brain, when I have been a good little Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735..? I haven’t mind-flayed any fleshy ones, and I have been thinking good thoughts 010001001011010010…

Onwards, forwards and inwards to innards listening ones, as you take a big breath of  SILENCE! into your virgin pink lungs and…

<ITEM>Sponsorhip Boys, Sponsorship Boys…plus the jangle of jingles and other etceteras.

<ITEM> SILENCE News with US news-trolls Gary Lactenberg & Danny Beastman, covering the next 12 months of eyeball-scintillating DC Comics!

<ITEM> Me, Julio Gary & The Beast down by the schoolyard, reviewing comics! Actually it’s the Reviewniverse: They don’t review Prophet, but do it in a kind way. But then they DO review Avengers Assemble: Age Of Ultron (from Affable Al Ewing), Avengers Arena, Justice League of America, Suicide Squad, Wolverine (Smug Cover Alert), Batman, Uber, Katana, Thor: God Of Thunder, Avenging Spiderman, Uncanny Avengers and 2000AD.

<ITEM> Jason’s Challenge is Infinity…will Gary be man enough?

<ITEM> An all singing review of Walking Dead

<ITEM> Savoy Books curio Michael Moorcock’s The Jewel In The Skull in The Beast’s Bargain Basement.

And that is the very lot you sorry bunch of cry babies. Go back to your mudhuts and scrabble for grubs.

click to download SILENCE!#62

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

SILENCE! #15

May 23rd, 2012

SOMEONE’S IN MY FRUIT CELLAR!!!

 

Ayo, weary traveller, pull up a stool and bathe your stinkin’ dogs in a hot bubbly bath…it’s time for the 15th edition of SILENCE!, the podcast that is no longer taking prisoners but rather is executing them, Miller’s Crossing-style in the middle of the woods, with just a hat blowing in the breeze for company…

 

In this very special episode we have a guest appearance from none other than BOBSY MINDLESS who swings by Lactus’ Cosmic Loungeship for a cup of tea and some heavy duty 2000ad chat (including the best Dredd analysis you’ll find on the intywebosphere, and a wholehearted spunking over Zaucer of Zilk and Flesh). But I’m getting ahead of myself! Before that Beast debuts his deeply sensual deep house ballad ‘SATANUS! (Human Flesh)’ and Lactus gives us a taste of his LIVE acoustic singer-songwriter powers with ‘Crossover Classix’. The SILENCE! News comes next in the way that night follows day and vomiting follows Cinzano, with an exciting announcement about SILENCECON 2012!

 

Then, and only then, the two-time twannies get onto vital topic of COMICS…thank god. They do talk about:

Peter Bagge’s Reset, Saga, Scalped, Fantastic Four (Nazis Win!), Shade, Fury, Hellblazer, and more…

Then Lactus grits his teeth and prepares to receive the soul-punishment that is ‘Crossover Classix with Gary Lactussssss’ and tries gamely to read all the various AVX and Owlfight shit that is being pumped his way. Including discussions of Nightwing, Red Hood and The Outlaws, Catwoman, Avengers Academy, AVX VS…so nothing good basically.

 

Then The Beast brings back the purple prose with an appreciation of Don McGregor’s Black Panther: ‘Panther’s Rage’ in Beast’s Bargain Basement, and drops in a word about Michel Fiffe’s awesome looking Suicide Squad comic.

All this and a whole hot mess more in the love letter from us that means you’re fucked forever…SILENCE!

 

click to download