December 9th, 2015
YOUR THIN PAPER WINGS, IN THE WIND, DANGLING
Roll the dice – move forward 4 steps. You find yourself at the clearing of a large empty podcast. To your right are some dense opinion shrubs. To the left a bubbling pool of judgments. Roll the dice – you decide to ignore both and move forward 8 paces towards the giant floating skull in the centre of the clearing. Roll the dice – you ask it a question: “Where am I?” The skull opens it’s mouth and with a terrifying ear-splitting screech it tells you…”SILENCE!”
<ITEM> And the guest-train keeps on rolling – not content with shattering senses with our senses-shattering Brandon Graham special last week, Gary Lactus, The Beast Must Die and Bobsy are joined by megatronic comics leg-end and all round superchap KIERON GILLEN on this latest pre-festive edition of the internet’s most beloved podcast.
<ITEM> Sponsorship, admin, STAR WARS day at Gosh Comics on 12th December, the whole shebang. Meat ‘n’ two veg just the way you like it.
<ITEM> There’s a special exciting celebrity segment as Bobsy’s daughter Junior Bobzone asks Kieron some questions about his Darth Vader comic and Star Wars in general. Have we mentioned Star Wars yet? STAR WARS STAR WARS STAR WARS STAR WARS STAR WARS MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU STAR WAAAAAAAAAARGH
<ITEM> The Reviewniverse once again struggles to contain the multitude of opinions and jibber-jabber, and despite some…interesting technical issues the boys talk up Matt Boyce, Unfollow, The Vision, Paul John Milne, Vertigo, Phonogram, Plutonia, Dr Strange, Daredevil, ET, Paper Girls, Daft Punk, Pretty Deadly, Scott Pilgrim, Dark Empire, Robots With These Guys and so much more…
<ITEM> The Beast ducks out early and the others shimmy off into the sunset…a mess? By god yes, but what a glorious mess.
<ITEM> *drops mic*
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November 5th, 2015
LOOK HERE! IT’S
House To Astonish to ponder the impossibly specific question, ARE THINGS BETTER OR WORSE.
Unsurprisingly things turn pretty ramblesome pretty quickly as our cosmic castaways talk about Comic Book Movies, Bill Jemas and Joe Quesada and The Changing Face Of The Industry In General. There’s some laughs, some sagely nods and some lovely Moral messages at the end.
You can support us using Patreon if you like.
March 16th, 2015
YOU CAN CRY, YOU CAN MOPE, BUT CAN YOU SWING FROM A GOOD ROPE?
Ahh yes…um, look okay everyone…stop talking please…can you…can you… sorry, can you just… look please just sit down and stop talk… um hello? HELLO? I said..I SAID.. can you please just…no look put that down and just… look will you stop talking for just one… what? yes, well just come in and sit down and try not to… excuse me, would you mind just…? Look will you be quiet for just one..what? Yes..what? Yes I AM the substitute blurb writer, why do you… look can you just put that..no, no I COULD actually be a full time blurb writer if…what? Sorry, can you..OUCH! OKAY!!! WHO THREW THAT GRAPHIC NOVEL AT MY HEAD??? You KNOW how much those fully painted numbers weigh…Okay…now just settle down. Settle…what? WHAT? What do you mean I’ve run out of
<ITEM> The Beast Must Die & Gary Lactus have a particularly itchy case of the sponsorshingles, with the usual nods to Dave’s Comics and Gosh Comics, and an in-depth discussion of Zoos.
<ITEM> A smart tug on the winkie and we’re off into the Reviewniverse, with hearty happy earthy discussions of Star Wars, Darth Vader, Princess Leia, Surface, Ms Marvel, Ragnarok, Rat God, Howard The Duck, Steve Gerber, Marvel Dinner Comics, Hellbreak, Fantastic Four, Southern Cross and much much much much (not) much more.
<ITEM> It’s the brand new movie section we’re calling Everything Comes Back To Rocky IV, as The Beast discusses recent filmic treats Godzilla and Edge Of Tomorrow: Live, Die, Repeat, Cruise. He also watched Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs 2 but he’s not going to tell you the Dear Listeners, about that. The Tacodile was pretty great though, right?
<ITEM> Come on, we all need a good wee and some dinner, so let’s call it a night, eh? Have a good SILENCE!
February 14th, 2013
I’M A DEREK, AND DEREKS DON’T RUN!
Love is in the air for Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735, happy listeners, love is in the air! If by ‘love’ you mean a lethal blitz-swarm of nano-locusts, and by ‘air’ you mean the burning red sky of this shredded techno-pillaged burnt out husk of a reality…it’s the SILENCE! Valentines Special.
In this sticky, throbbing, hormonal edition of the podcast that some people claim to listen to on a semi-reglar basis, The Beast Must Die and Gary Lactus open their hoary old hearts to you gentle listeners, and beg ‘LOVE US! LOVE US!!’ And what hard hearted swine could resist?
<ITEM> The SILENCE! News features the hottteszzt noose stories from around the world, presented by smooth-talking, leather-skinned, white toothed Gary Lactenberg, and grizzled old divorced news badger, Danny Beastman…
<ITEM> The Reviewniverse splits opens it’s maw and sucks the twosome into it’s mindmelting reality-soup…but they don’t go down without a fight, no! They talk about the DC Young Romance Special (and tangentially the Fleetway Action Special from the 90′s), Red Team, Dial H, Channel 52, Iron Man (from Gillen & The Gland), All New X-Bendis, Snapshot, Multiple Warheads, Fashion Beast, Mud Man, Earth 2, Hellboy in Hell, and Adventure Time (with a stumbling mention of Thomas Herpich).
<ITEM> There’s a Guest Review of Star Wars from Kevin Trevors
<ITEM> The Beast talks up the re-release of the incendiary Seven Miles A Second from David Wojnarowicz, James Romberger and Marguerite Van Cook
<ITEM> A live, beautiful acapella version of Defenders Of The Earth??? Surely not (yes of course it happens)
So when you’ve finished making sweet love to the sentient object of your choice, why not lay back, spark up a gasper and listen to SILENCE! no.50!