Mindless Ones

Welcome to the SILENCE! Seasonal Scrapings! Gary Lactus, has cobbled questionable content from the contents of our Patreon, namely Gary’s Com Dom Corner, a new venture in which he reads and reviews a comic suggested by members of C-Unit. The three Com Dom Corners here feature Legion Of Suprheroes, Wildcats: Trilogy #1 and Nth Man The Ultimate Ninja. But before that, Gary runs down his Best Of 2023 list.  Have a big Christgasm everyone!

I’M NOT GOING TO DEBATE YOU, JERRY! I’M NOT GOING TO DEBATE!

(The scene opens, as Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 hangs in notion-space, a burning neon digital star of impeccable cyber-breeding)

We cut to: SILENCE!

The 3-d camera prowls across a vibrant landscape of shifting wordscapes and roaming flocks of ideaforms. The sky is burning vermillion, dappled with thought-bubbles buoyed on an endless layer of hot air.

With a triumphant scream of raw pulsing data, Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 bellows:

“<ITEM> Sponsorships, jinglehoods and the SILENCE! News with droning human newsbags Danny Beastman & Gary Lactenberg.

<ITEM> The Reviewniverse is breached and The Beast & Lactus storm it’s ramparts. It’s a gimpgasm of comics talk about 12 Reasons To Die (Big Ghost!), Dream Merchant, Dream Thief, Fall of the House Usher, Legion Of Superheroes, Wolverine & The X-Men, Red She-Hulk, Regular Show, Wonder Woman, Savage Wolverine, Cable & The X-Force, X, Nova, Age of Ultron, FF, Prophet, Uber, Black Beetle Fatale and 2000ad.

<ITEM> Thrilling new feature Reader I Couldn’t Finish It has Green Arrow and Supergirl.

<ITEM> The show really gets going with impassioned discussion of Eurovision and Tony Hart.

(Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 exits, chased by bear…)

click to download SILENCE!#63

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

Welcome weary travellers. Come rest yourselves a while in the basement. Mind that mildewed copy of Razzle and that box of broken Transformers. Sit yourselves down between that crate of warped vinyl (can I interest anyone in some vintage James Galway? Or maybe a copy of Duran Duran’s ‘Rio’?), and that decomposing Garfield, and I’ll delight you with some recent treasures from the Beast’s Bargain Basement…

In order to overcome the trauma of shelling out £2/$3 for a new comic (but wow, ain’t it just worth it with all the time and money they’ve put into that turd-polishing computer colour!?!), I have recently returned to the blessed womb of cheap-as-fuck back issues, and it’s got to be said, found some true gems. And some shite. But it’s cheap shite, and that’s what counts.

More after the jump