March 28th, 2017
WHAT WHAT, MY POP ROCKS!
Gary Lactus hosts an epic mash up lash up* starring hard boiled gritty pre-Giuliani New York cop just two weeks away from retirement, Johnathan Dick and a hypnotic robotic Spare 5 who returns like the monster from an ever diminishing horror franchise! Better than that though is the explosive entrance of crime fighting duo The Beast Must Die and Mini-Beast, ready to deliver a 200+ megaton purple nurple right on the left boob of the London Underworld! Wanna know what we talk about? There was loads and load and plenty of it not comics. Here’s a list of words!
2000AD Titan Editions, akira, Animal Man, Beneath, Blair Witch, Cry of the Werewolf, Curse Words, Dennis Potter, Doom Patrol, Found Footage, Found Footage Films, Gabriel Hardman, Gi Joe Vs Transformers: The Movie, Hitman, horror, Invisible Republic, Johnathan Dick, Judge Dredd Deviation, Junji Ito, Justice League Trailer, Kong: Skull Island, Larry Cohen, Larry Fessenden, Lone Wolf and Cub, Manga no Manben, Mini Beast, Naoki Urasawa, Nemesis, Not Quite Hollywood, Roger Corman, Romaction, Romance of a different name, Sandman: Overture, Scratched Live!, Silence! Because the Film’s Started, Slaine Choose Your Own Adventure Comics, Stray Bullets, TBMD, The Beast Must Die, The Belfry, The Origin of Spare 5, walking dead
FEAR THE NIGHT!
*made you look!
January 31st, 2017
ITEM HEY BOY MAN, YOU LOOK LIKE YOU’VE DRAGGED YOUR WAY HERE FROM UNDER SIX FEET OF SHIT, GET THAT STENCH OUT OF MY ATRIUM AND WIPE YOUR NINNY FEET ON THE BEAR’S HEAD
ITEM WHAT’S THAT MILKY BOY KID? TIRED OF MUMMY’S GREENS? WANT TO GO WHERE THE REAL CHAT IS FOUND? THE HARD CHAT? THE GREASY CHAT? THE COMICS CHAT?SILENCE, YOU FUCKING MUDDLE, SILEEEENCE!!!
ITEM OH THAT’S NEW, OH THAT’S SPECIAL, SILENCE! SIX BILLION, YOU WANT A CUNTING MEDAL OR THE CHEST TO PIN IT ON, CHICKEN LEGS?
ITEM WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? SOME GRIPPER PISSING HIS INITIALS INTO THE MANTLE OF THE BEAST? WANTS TO BE THE MAIN COCK? WANTS TO PARADE HIS BROILING BULK? LORD NUNEATON FUCKING SAVAGE IS IT? HARDLY A MAIN ATTRACTION, HARDLY A HARD ANYTHING, LOOK AT HIM CHATTING UP GARY LACTUS, MAKES YOU FUCKING SICK
ITEM ADMIN! SPONSORSHIP! SILENCE! THE FILM’S STARTED WITH LACTUS BANGING FIT TO BURST ON THAT FUCKING FULL TIME CARD TRICKSTER JODOROWSKY AND HIS ART SHOW RODEO BAKE OFF. CUNT.
ITEM BALLY HAI WHAT A SURPRISE, AS THIS FUCKING COBBLING TEAM FROM THE DEEP DEEP DEPTHS OF ONY-FUCKNUTS-CARE-A-SHIT DELVE INTO FUNNY BOOKS LIKE FROGMEN THROUGH BOILING PISS: KAMANDI CHALLENGE! SAGA! DOOM PATROL! HOOKJAW! THE RAY! VIXEN! KILLER FUCKING FROST! DR STRANGE AND HIS BROKEN HANDYCLAMPS! MOOK KNIGHT! ISLAND! GIVE ME FUCKING STRENGTH
ITEM YOU LOOKING BACK AND REALISING YOU BEGGED FOR EVERY COB OF THIS SHIT
December 20th, 2016
PA RUM PUM PUM PUM
It’s beginning to smell a lot like Christmas. The goose is on the ground, the snow is getting fat. Welcome to the none-more-festive edition of SILENCE! This is it folks, the culmination of 100′s of hours of work – choreographers, lighting, a full orchestra, special guest stars, yule logs burning on open fires, christmas fucking jumpers…absolutely NONE of this will appear on this SILENCE! Christmas Special!! What you will get is Gary Lactus, too ill to podcast and lying on the sofa, beloved Bobsy representing in full effect and The Beast Must Die holding it all together like some hirsute Michael Parkinson. We can’t promise you eggnog, but we can promise a hot pocket full of comics chat to warm your jingle bells in this most wonderful time of the year. Strap in, strap on and prepare for docking!
<ITEM> Blimey, look what happens when the sturdy hand of the Space God is off the tiller…shambolic admin on an unimaginable level, barely remembered Sponsorship, plus our lewdest opening banter ever. Blame that pottymouthed club comedian Bobsy!
<ITEM> In a spurious nod towards our festive theme, there’s some chat about festive movies including Krampus and Scrooged. Plus the mysteries of Karen Black, Karen Allen and Margot Kidder
<ITEM> SILENCE! (Because The Film Has Started) features chat of little known B-movies Star Wars: Rogue One
<ITEM> Lo! The Reviewniverse. There’s some hefty chat about the penultimate episode of Alan Moore’s late-stage masterpiece Providence. Then the Young Animal books Doom Patrol and Shade The Changing Girl are discussed at some length. Bobsy rounds up his Thought Bubble 2016 top picks and there’s a bit of chat about Rick Veitch. Christmassy as all heck right!?
<ITEM> Lazarus-like, Gary returns with a festive kiss off, and some Christmas cheer is finally raised.
Now go forth and unwrap!