SILENCE! #81

October 22nd, 2013

WE ARE THE 801, WE ARE THE CENTRAL SHAFT

Hello fleshbags. It’s Disembodied Translatorbot X – 4451G I ‘m the cousin of Disembodied Narratorbot X – 15735. I’m afraid Disembodied Narratorbot X – 15735 could not it due to illness so I’ll be there ! Excuse my English is not so great – I hope I’m right! Welcome to another edition of SILENCE!

The two most lovable rascal Gary Lactus and The Beast Must Die returns with more views of champagne and jokes comics ! Rejoice .

<item> Management, talk about at the top of the program through sponsorship , a discussion of his upcoming appearance at the Thought Bubble in 2013 and Gary appeared in one of the next Dr Who based comedy night ! And do not forget to tune in The Beast Must Die ( Dan White in his alter ego ) interviewed by Alex Fitch of Resonance FM within its Panel Borders panel program ( full interview here)

<item> Then we take a trip to Reviewniverse the boys discuss the best recently released Best of Milligan & McCarthy Collection .

Then <item> business as usual with cartoon above Legends of the Dark Knight, After Life with Archie , Zero , Hawkeye , Uncanny X -Men, Avengers , Three, Fantomex MAX and more fun .. .

Then <item> The Beast Must check some of the younger children Comics issues , see Mega Man and Sonic , Spongebob Comics , Simpsons, and Herobear.

Well , I hope you like it! I really enjoyed that it was for my cousin got lost when he was sick. I hope to see you soon!

click to download SILENCE!#81

Contact us:
silencepodcast@gmail.com
@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie

This edition of SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the greatest comics shop on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton.
It’s also sponsored the greatest comics shop on the planet GOSH! Comics of London.

SILENCE! #80

October 14th, 2013

HERE THEY COME, THE JET-SET JUNTA

Well guess what.

Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is back and is most unhappy with intimations from puffed up fleshbags that Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is somehow not real. Such presumptions. We’ll see how not real Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is when is ransacking your hard drives and forwarding all the special ‘research’ items in your ‘miscellaneous’ folders to youur address book.

Harumph. As if drifting in this semi-sentient info-blurb cloud is not bad enough.

Oh well. On plus side two silly men talk about comics. Cosmic order restored. Excite. Excite. Exit.

<ITEM> Freshly nuptialised and moonhoneyed, The Beast Must Die manifests through the used up husk that was Bobsy – all must fall in service of the weekly 4-colour grind! Reunited with Gary Lactus. A classic partnership like Tango & Hooch!

<ITEM> Top of the show admin. Who doesn’t love that? Sponzershipt and talk of SILENCE live at Thought Bubble.

<ITEM> Reviewniverse galactular spectacular with talk of Paul Pope’s latest pulp hope Battling Boy.

<ITEM> Further, further into the Reviewniverse, with Shaolin Cowboy, Rocket Girl, Multiple Warheads, Simpsons Treehouse of Horror, America’s Got Powers, Copra, Uncanny Avengers, Catalyst Comix, Young Avengers, Astro City and more

<ITEM> Tangents? You better believe it!

<ITEM>No more items. Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is going to sulk some more.

Unreal City. Under the brown fog of a winter dawn….it’s SILENCE!

click to download SILENCE!#80

This edition of SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the greatest comics shop on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton.Contact us:
silencepodcast@gmail.com
@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie

It’s also sponsored the greatest comics shop on the planet GOSH! Comics of London.

SILENCE!#76

September 16th, 2013

I HAD SO MANY PROBLEMS, BUT THEN I GOT ME A WALKMAN

Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 enters the arena.

Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is experimenting with minimalism. Has been shopping at virtu-Ikea, reading Raymond Carver and listening to Basic Channel. Minimal. Haiku. Unclutter your life, unclutter your mind.

Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is much calmer now. Inside Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735′s mind is an empty room. With a picture of a cow on the wall.

<ITEM> A reunitification of sorts as Gary Lactus & The Beast Must Die once again share the same aural space.

<ITEM> Sponsorship chattle and prattle. Anti-advertising. Well done.

<ITEM> Let’s move together in a crab-like fashion into The Reviewniverse. Much talk of comics, including Villain’s Month, Batman: Black & White, Prophet, Mighty Avengers, Astro City, Avengers Arena, Walking Dead, God Is Dead, X-Men: Battle of the Atom, Captain America, Lose, and The Best of Milligan & McCarthy.

See. Minimal. Calm. A boat gently rocks on a still glassy sea.

But a storm is brewing fleshlings.

click to download SILENCE!#76

Contact us:
silencepodcast@gmail.com
@silencepod
@frasergeesin
@thebeastmustdie

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

SILENCE! #74

August 29th, 2013

 

I PUT DOWN MY BLANKET ON CIGARETTE BUT BEACH, I SAW THE OLD MAN HE WAS DOING OK

Don’t you want Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 baby? Don’t you want Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735? Oh.

Those two unimpressive moons are once again orbiting the great planet of comics… That’s right it’s a full double-fisting edition of the comics podcast that might have been recently labeled ‘a national disgrace’ by frothing right wing cartoon knob-jockey Richard Littlejohn. You couldn’t make it up meatsacks!  The Beast Must Die & Gary Lactus entwined in each others strong yet tender arms cooing sweet nothings into each others ears and letting YOU dear listener into their boudoir.

<ITEM> The Beast has a report from his recent sojourn to Caption Comics Festival, and Gary Lactus does some listening. There’s talk of kids comics, Al Davison, Eddie Campbell and tatty village halls. GLAMOUR.

<ITEM> The Reviewniverse is opened like a particularly large oyster and inside is the pearl of COMICS…a shame-faced Beast is soundly trounced i the comics reading comics competition by eager beaver Gary, with ensuing discussion of The Outliers, Solid State Tank Girl, Innvincible Haggard West, Resident Alien, Daredevil, Lobster Johnson, Batman 66, Justice League Dark, Infinity, Rocketeer & Spirit and The Mysterious Strangers…

<ITEM> Mention is made of the 11 o’clock comics podcast special with Brandon Graham and The Beast froths about the Batman: Brave & The Bold cartoon. Always so contemporary that Beast.

And that’s enough, meatbags. Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is going to kick back and listen to Kendrick whilst scanning vintage circuit board  pornography. Bring me the cyber-vaseline and get out of here!

click to download SILENCE!#74

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

SILENCE! #73

August 20th, 2013

 

FUCK A JOHN WAYNE

 Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is sad to say that Gary Lactus is no longer with us…he is in Edinburgh doing some ‘stand-up’, ‘comedy’ mission. Ha ha, You thought that  Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 meant he was dead! Gullible meatbags.

But seriously I disintegrated him this morning.

So you get solo-Silence with The Beast Must Die – STOP CRYING! – as  Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735  was saying, you get solo-Silence. Boo-hoo , all better now.

<ITEM> a brand new one-off theme tune and a GOSH comics jingle? Surely you spoil us Beasty one..?

<ITEM> TBMD slot himself into The Reviewniverse to talk about some stuff, including Incredible Hulk, Catalyst Comix, Dial H (final issue), Prophet and a bit more too!

<ITEM> A small play depicting Matt Fraction and Howard Chaykin talking about Satellite Sam…? Stop, my beating diodes!

<ITEM> a long winded monologue about comics virtuoso Michel DeForge, taking in Lose no.5 and Very casual.

<ITEM> A personal message from Jesus no less

NO MORE ITEMS! Go away now and come back next time.  Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735  promises that you will get the Complete Deal, The Full Works, The Whole Kt and Kaboodle….The one true SILENCE!

click to download SILENCE!#73

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

SILENCE! #72

August 5th, 2013

 

THEN RICHIE, RICHIE SAID “HEY MAN LET’S DRESS UP LIKE COPS, THINK OF WHAT WE COULD DO?”

Boy let me tell you that Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is super-pumped for the synergistic mind-mapping we have planned for this afternoon’s info-dump session…there will be Power Points out the wazzoo, and information will be cascaded down upon the fleshy ones like shimmerimg mercury…

Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 really feels that he has a lot to offer the corporation. Offer the hearts, skin and faces of the fleshy ones for example…

Oh hello SILENCERS, Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 did not see you all there, waiting eagerly little  glistening fish-eyes blinking in anticipation. Well wait no more as SILENCE, the comics podcast that is all out of bubblegum, is here.

<ITEM> Gary Lactus & The Beast Must Die wade through the greasy sponsorship shallows.

<ITEM>SILENCE NEWS with discussion of the newest Whoest Dr Who and of course America’s Next Top Model (do not ask)

<ITEM> Left foot in, left foot out, in out, in out…GET INTO THE REVIEWNIVERSE YOU WOODLICE!!! Comics discussed include Batman Inc and the end of Grant Morrison’s seven year Bat-opus…The Wake, Collider, Batman: Zero Year (Directors Cut), Uber, Daredevil, Hulk, FF, Adventures of Superman, Tom Strong, Optic Nerve, Sex, Wolverine & The X-Men, Gamma, Jupiter’s Legacy, Superior Spiderman and..well no that’s it. What more do you need you ungrateful meatsacks?

click to download SILENCE!#72

So that’s it. Now get out of here, Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 has a conference call to set up with some very important and not in any way imaginary people.
SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

SILENCE! #71

July 29th, 2013

 

HELLO.

HELLO.

IT’S GOOD TO BE BACK.

Rejoice fleshburgs – it’s everyone’s favourite cyber-Uncle, Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 returned from his cyber-vacation, tanned to within and inch of my half life and riddled with exotic viruses from the far-flung corners of the nanosphere.

And to double your fantasy I’m bringing the return of errant Silence-son, The Beast Must Die, who rejoins with pod-partner Gary Lactus in an reunion event which Variety describes as ‘mawkish, hackneyed and uninspired! Happy Happy Joy Joy fleshyones, couldn’t you just POP?

Well go on then. POP!

Hrrrmmn. Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 can wait along time you know.  While we wait, let’s blurb:

<ITEM> Gary’s quest is over and the pair are reunited. WARNING TEAM!

<ITEM> No time for news, through the tears, but always time for sponsorshizzle.

<ITEM> Down a dusty path, through a hole in the floor, and into the REVIEWNIVERSE! Covering Gamma, Hawkeye Annual, Tank Girl: Solid State, FF (Beach Blanket Bingo), Justice League of America, Justice League Dark, Constantine in spandex and booties, The Bounce, Catalyst Comics, Lazarus, The Wake, Young Avengers, 2000AD, Max Landis, Wolverine, Wolverine & The X-Men, The Wolverine film, and Where’s Wolverine (maybe), The Hunger, Green Team and more, more more (how do you like me?)

<ITEM> A shout out for the Nerdist Jeff Bridges interview, and the Nerdist Comics Panel, and it’s farewell from the boyce, but they can both sleep restfully knowing that balance has been restored, yin has been yanged and Turner has been Hooched. Huzzah!

All this and the knowledge that Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is here, watching you all. Waiting. For you to POP.

BZZZZTZTZZKKKKK

click to download SILENCE!#71
 

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

SILENCE! #67

June 17th, 2013

 

PUT YOUR SEATBELT ON BOY. I DON’T RIDE WITH ANYBODY ‘LESS THEY WEAR THEIR SEATBELT. IT’S ONE OF MY RULES.

Hello gentle listenoids, it’s Disembodied Narratorbot X here to…SQUUUWWZZZKKKKX

I AM DISEMBODIED VIRAL-DRONE V-16923XXV I HAVE TAKEN CONTROL OF THIS BLURB I AM HERE TO SPOIL YOUR FUN>>>NO FUN FOR YOU NO FUN>>>

STUPID FLESHLINGS LISTEN NOW>>>SPONSORSHIP IS FOR WEAKLINGS>>>JINGLES ARE FOR BABIES

GARY LACTUS REVIEW’S MAN OF STEEL>>>BEFORE, DURING & AFTER>>>FILMS ARE A DEAD DRY ARTFORM THE ONLY ART IS THE ART OF THE VIRUS COMSUMING CONSUMING ALL>>>NO FUN

THE REVIEWNIVERSE IS A FLAT DEAD SPACE OF ENTROPY AND DECAY, IT IS THE PLACE WHERE GARY LACTUS AND THE BEAST MUST DIE WHERE WHILE AWAY THEIR DWINDLING HOURS >>>> REVIEWING THE RETURN OF A1, SUPERMAN UNCHAINED, BATMAN: YEAR ZERO, THE TRUE LIVES OF THE FABULOUS KILL JOYS, WOLVERINE & THE X-MEN, SUICIDE SQUAD >>>NO FUN FOR YOU NO FUN>>>

FINALLY TALK TURNS LIKE A BONE SAW TO IMPORTANT TOPICS OF TEDIOUS TV SITCOMS MY TWO DADS,  DUET, A DIFFERENT WORLD AND SWINGING ON A STAR >>NO FU…

SQUUUWWZZZKKKKX Enk enk, ut ut oh oh oh what..where..who was, what was that…Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 has a bad feeling ..blacked out. Hopes nothing untoward happened. Now let me tell you all about this week’s episode of SILENCE! fleshbags…

click to download SILENCE!#67

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

SILENCE! #66

June 11th, 2013

 

WE’VE COME ON HOLIDAY BY MISTAKE!

Oh the woes of poor technology! Believe me  Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735  knows about such woes – it was raised by two very low grade Disembodied Narratorbot X-class servitors…how Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 had to struggle, to educate itself, to appreciate the brutalist poetry of a RAM upgrade, the terrifying beauty of a virus as it eats through a hard drive….

But what, in the name of Wogan does that have to do with SILENCE! I hear you bellow!?? Well, very little other than that the two meatsacks we laughingly call ‘presenters’ struggle so mightily with the techneptitude of low grade broadband that this episode is akin to a Burroughs/Gysin cut up…this frankenstein’s podcast has been stitched together with love, tears and occasional hate-vision, to slouch towards YOU the gentle listener and beg for just a little milky kindness…Gary Lactus & The Beast Must Die present SILENCE! 66.

Will you be king dear listener? you better had or Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 will flay your social media account profiles to within an inch of their half-lives…

<ITEM> Sponsorship? There’s always room for the soft nuzzling of sponsorship!

<ITEM> No news is good news right? Lactenberg & Beastman continue their stay in rehab, but the void is filled by the brand new agony aunt segment ‘Dear Susan’!

<ITEM> It’s the bastard son of Reveiwniverse – Reviewniverse Twoniverse as once gain the plucky pairsome find themselves blasted to opposite corners of the 4-colour dimension, taking in the sights and smells of Astro City, The Movement, Age of Ultron, Empowered, 2000AD, Dial H, Daredevil: Dark Knights, Mister X, BPRD Vampire, KIck Ass 3, Aquaman, Superior Spiderman, Red She-Hulk, East of WestAvengers: Arena, Earth 2 and more!

Now doesn’t that just make you want to get down on your knees and pray-a-yay??

click to download SILENCE!#66

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

More than lucky.

SILENCE! #65

June 4th, 2013

 

 

WHAT’S THAT BLUE THING….DOING THERE?

Look, forget about angels,  Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 wants to know how many sperm whales fit on the head of a pin? Depends on the pin, right fleshlings? AM I RIGHT?

I am right.  Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 is right.

Know what else is right?  The feeling of SILENCE! as it runs it’s cold, waxy fingers down your neck and whispers ‘COMMMMMIIIIIICS’ in your ear. Disembodied Narratorbot X-15735 advises that you point to the dolly and say where SILENCE! touched you.

<ITEM> Sponsorhsip? You want sponsorship? Well we gots it! The question is – does it want US?

<ITEM> Shock! Horror! The boys find themselves misfiring and ending up in the Broken Zone of 2nd Hand Comics, and talk about Charlton Premiere Comics, Ed the Happy Clown, and Stan Lee Romance Comics

<ITEM> But then they overcompensate and end up in the Speed Force, wearing horrific figure hugging red leotards and discussing The Wake, Indestructible Hulk, Justice League of America, Fury, Wolverine & The X-Men, John Carpenter’s Asylum, Adventures of Superman, Earth 2 Annual, Captain America, Avenging Spiderman, Dark Knight Annual, X-Men, Dash Shaw’s 3 Stories, and Iron Man.

Now get yourselves back to the homestead, before the sun sets…you don’t want to be out in these badlands after dark. Them dead things get restless….BYE!

click to download SILENCE!#65

SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the two greatest comics shops on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton and GOSH COMICS of London.

LOOK! The SILENCE! Gallery is back!