SILENCE! #211

January 31st, 2017

ITEM HEY BOY MAN, YOU LOOK LIKE YOU’VE DRAGGED YOUR WAY HERE FROM UNDER SIX FEET OF SHIT, GET THAT STENCH OUT OF MY ATRIUM AND WIPE YOUR NINNY FEET ON THE BEAR’S HEAD

ITEM WHAT’S THAT MILKY BOY KID? TIRED OF MUMMY’S GREENS? WANT TO GO WHERE THE REAL CHAT IS FOUND? THE HARD CHAT? THE GREASY CHAT? THE COMICS CHAT?SILENCE, YOU FUCKING MUDDLE, SILEEEENCE!!!

ITEM OH THAT’S NEW, OH THAT’S SPECIAL, SILENCE! SIX BILLION, YOU WANT A CUNTING MEDAL OR THE CHEST TO PIN IT ON, CHICKEN LEGS?

ITEM WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? SOME GRIPPER PISSING HIS INITIALS INTO THE MANTLE OF THE BEAST? WANTS TO BE THE MAIN COCK? WANTS TO PARADE HIS BROILING BULK? LORD NUNEATON FUCKING SAVAGE IS IT? HARDLY A MAIN ATTRACTION, HARDLY A HARD ANYTHING, LOOK AT HIM CHATTING UP GARY LACTUS, MAKES YOU FUCKING SICK

ITEM ADMIN! SPONSORSHIP! SILENCE! THE FILM’S STARTED WITH LACTUS BANGING FIT TO BURST ON THAT FUCKING FULL TIME CARD TRICKSTER JODOROWSKY AND HIS ART SHOW RODEO BAKE OFF. CUNT.

ITEM BALLY HAI WHAT A SURPRISE, AS THIS FUCKING COBBLING TEAM FROM THE DEEP DEEP DEPTHS OF ONY-FUCKNUTS-CARE-A-SHIT DELVE INTO FUNNY BOOKS LIKE FROGMEN THROUGH BOILING PISS: KAMANDI CHALLENGE! SAGA! DOOM PATROL! HOOKJAW! THE RAY! VIXEN! KILLER FUCKING FROST! DR STRANGE AND HIS BROKEN HANDYCLAMPS! MOOK KNIGHT! ISLAND! GIVE ME FUCKING STRENGTH

ITEM YOU LOOKING BACK AND REALISING YOU BEGGED FOR EVERY COB OF THIS SHIT

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This edition of SILENCE! is proudly sponsored by the greatest comics shop on the planet, DAVE’S COMICS of Brighton. It’s also sponsored the greatest comics shop on the planet GOSH! Comics of London.

12 Responses to “SILENCE! #211”

  1. Daniel S. Says:

    Hope you’re feeling better soon Gary.

  2. Bengt Says:

    Spider-Woman had an insemination from a anonymous donor. It was revealed at the end of the first arch I think.

    Also, the reason there isn’t any CW2 tie ins now (Spider-Woman had one a couple of months ago) is because that event is over. It’s all about X-Men punching Inhumans now, do keep up! :)

  3. Zakaria Says:

    Oh god, the new Jodorowsky films sound like a hoot.

    It’s such a shame we never saw his ‘Dune’.

  4. Gary Lactus Says:

    Daniel S, I’m getting there thank you. Sorry about the coughing.

    Thanks for the info, Bengt. You win our fabled anti non-prize!

    Zakaria, it surely would’ve been something. I’m quite partial to Lynch’s Dune though.

  5. Zakaria Says:

    Gary Lactus, speaking of Lynch, I’ve really enjoyed the ‘Diane’ podcast, so now I’m of course wondering what a Jodorowsky TV show would be like…

    SACRED COW-BOY
    Cowboy being a deranged circus performer
    The circus performer being Jesus Christ.
    Christ being one of Jodorowsky sons.
    Jodorowsky’s son actually being Jodorowsky.

    It’s probably for the best that we get him in these smaller doses.

  6. Gary Lactus Says:

    And lots of little people.

  7. Tim B Says:

    Must admit I’m quite conservative in my Jodorowsky film appreciation – Holy Mountain and Topo are my faves. Saw Endless Poetry and yeah I’d like to be making stuff like that in my mid 80s too – genuinely not giving a fuck art. In reference to the Legends Of Tomorrow chat, can’t help thinking how the world would have turned out if Jodorowsky’s Dune had got made in ’75 and how it’s performance would have affected Fox’s decision to take a punt on another desert sci-fi flick…

    Comic-wise enjoying Doom Patrol as well. Sweet art & colours, story-wise it’s entertaining juggling that’s scratching a monthly issue vibe AFAIC

  8. Tam Says:

    Dune’s very high up on my ‘to watch’ list. Well strictly speaking my ‘rewatch’ list but don’t remember anything at all from the first time except thinking it wasn’t as good as ‘Empire Strikes back’ But feel I ought to read the book first. So I’ve decided to aim fairly low and make getting around to read and watch Dune my new years resolution for 2017

    Learning about the existence of Mariko Aoki was a revelation. I’ve spent a lot of time browsing in second hand bookshops and there has been the odd socially awkward moment now you come to mention it

  9. Bob Doublebob Says:

    Am I the only one who finds it messed up the way people with dwarfism are so often used to signify “surrealness*”? Can’t imagine how they must feel about it.

  10. Tam Says:

    Bob Doubledob, here’s the answer to how at least one dwarf feel about being used as a lazy signifier of surrealism (from the old Steve Buscemi film ‘Living in Oblivion’)
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OXlRG73ciaA

  11. Gary Lactus Says:

    Bob. No you are not. See also wheelchairs, giantism, burn victims, all disfigurement and twins.

  12. bobsy Says:

    … and the worst of these is twins.

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